What Makes Someone Positive?

The world can be a dark place and it’s difficult to see the bright side of things somedays. No one is exempt from negative events in life. However, there are tools for taking a more positive perspective during tough times. There are tactics for generating joy from within when there isn’t any around us. Today I want to share with you one of the most empowering frameworks for managing emotions.

The core idea of this framework is that events that happen to us (triggers) are not the cause of our feelings, they actually first lead to a thought. The thought we have based on the meaning we prescribe the event or trigger is what generates the feeling. Change your thought about the trigger, change your emotional experience. This concept is pictured below:

The meaning we assign to a trigger is what defines our emotional response to it. For example:

Trigger: The dog spills your drink on your coffee table as he runs towards you on the couch.

Thought: “My stupid dog always ruins everything! Ugh this day sucks.”

Emotion: Negativity, anger.

The above is an example of letting your brain assign a negative meaning to an event. Below is another way to interpret the same event with a different thought.

Trigger: The dog spills your drink on your coffee table as he runs towards you on the couch.

Thought: “Poor guy doesn't know any better, he was just trying to come over and say hi.”

Emotion: Affection, peace.

Of course, there’s still the reality of the mess that must cleaned up, but you can see that by just changing the thought, we can improve our emotional response to a situation. Let’s try an example that’s a little bigger.

Trigger: The world descends into a state of total pandemic, everything shuts down and it seems every aspect of your life is affected by this new global reality.

Thought: “This sucks. My life is basically put on hold through no fault of my own. I guess I’ll just bunker down and wait things go back to normal.”

Emotion: Fear, stagnation.

Now let’s watch the thought change.

Trigger: The world descends into a state of total pandemic, everything shuts down and it seems every aspect of your life is affected by this new global reality.

Thought: Wow, a lot of people are suffering right now, I'm not doing so hot either, but maybe I can help.

Emotion: Hope, motivation.

Choosing joy in less-than-ideal situations is a matter of assigning a different meaning to the events that happen to us. It’s not fake positivity, or just a “grin and bear it” solution. Instead, it’s dealing with the root problem: the meaning we assign to things that happen to us.

This tactic is used by positive thinkers around the world to maintain an upbeat attitude even through the most challenging situations. When we’re able to take hold of our personal power over our thoughts, then we unlock the ability to shape our feelings. Which ultimately means we have more energy and passion for our mission to serve others and make the world a better place.

Until next time, get out there and create the impossible in your life! 

Joey